Today is my 39th birthday. Like every year, I'm spending my day reflecting and planning out the year ahead, then focusing specifically on the next 90 days. There are two things I spend a lot of time doing on my birthday: meditating and journaling. Both practices involve a lot of prayer and reflection. For me, this is paramount when it comes to gaining clarity on my next steps.
This has been a year of ups and downs when it comes to my personal and professional relationships. Friends disappeared when I no longer lived my life according to their rules and expectations. A two-year relationship with a coach crashed and burned when I realized we were no longer aligned. In short, it's been a year of erecting boundaries that preserved and restored me.
There was a period in time when I would have done anything my coach asked. But as I was building PTL media (my online media passion project) earlier this year, I got wind of a few things that didn't sit well with me. Like a plan to monetize that didn't follow my plan, egos that needed stroking in the spotlight, and the building of a team that felt more like an attempt at sabotage. Then, I made the bold decision to ask a question about PTL during a mastermind meeting. It wasn't the beginning of the end; it was the nail in the coffin. The calls and messages I received from other mastermind members in the days that followed that meeting reminded me of two things. 1. I don't have to take an attack (their words, not mine) from anyone, let alone people I am paying to help me advance. 2. I am stronger than I give myself credit for and I need to protect that.
You see, I'd spent a lot of time following the direction of people who had not been given the vision for my business that I was. Yes, I saw the benefits of having a coach and it was even necessary to get me to where I am today. But what I've come to realize is that other people's instructions can only take you so far. When people see your accomplishments as a reflection of them, lines can become distorted. It's true that as business owners we look for testimonials as social proof of the great work we are doing. But when you begin to forget that your clients have goals and paths that are outside of your own agenda, it is a recipe for disaster.
I don't blame the coach or anyone else for the turmoil that has passed through over the last 365 days, instead chalking it up to part of my growth process. I'm grateful for the lessons learned, the connections I've made, and the changes that have ensued. It has created an atmosphere of peace in me that passes all understanding.
So as I reflect back on the sprints, stumbles, growth, and triumphs of the last year, I am reminded of the reason I began my business in the first place. My mission is and has always been to help bring order to people's businesses from the chaos they come to me with. I have the awesome ability to put people at ease. In doing so, I can help them see the big picture as well as all of the little pieces that can help them fill that picture in. One of my best friends has called me the dream catcher. I'm owning that now.
By giving up my process and power and allowing myself to swirl in the chaos of harmful relationships, I was not only hurting myself but those whom I serve.
So as I begin my 40th year of life, I am stepping back into my power. I am returning to the heart of my mission
and eliminating chaos to orchestrate peace. God knows that we need it in this world we live in today.
I invite you to join me on the journey for peace. Take some time to reflect on the chaos and confusion around you. Look at it honestly and determine who is the source.
Is it you? Is it them? And if it truly is them, have you played any part in perpetuating the problem by allowing "them" to remain in your orbit?
Drop me a line and let me know what you discover.